The Duck Pond
Thursday, November 27, 2003
Trying not to get stressed. I know there's no point really but I can't seem to help myself! I had a leaving do last week which was splendid but it only really hit me the other night at the pier getting pizza (had to do that before I leave) that next week I won't be living here anymore. It's a big change to come to terms with but I'll just have to break it down into smaller pieces and deal with it a bit at a time.
I've been having a lot of strange dreams lately. I put it mainly down to anxiety. Many of them have involved moving or work. Here are a few interesting (not directly moving or work related) ones.
Utterly bizzare dream where this geeky bloke was collecting eggs from nests down this wide road, lined with huge willow trees. An animal rights supporter woman was following him and telling him how wrong he was when he suddenly turned into a sparrow, only bright blue and looking a bit like a sparrow as created by Nick Park. The woman, after looking somewhat surprised for a second or two, went to pick the bird up and while doing so turned into a large, blue, Nick Park owl. They then started fighting to the death, feathers flying everywhere. It's all a bit blurry but I think the owl won.
I also had a horrible dream where I was being attacked by vampires (been watching too many episodes of "Angel" obviously) but the most horrific thing was that I could actually feel pain. There was a lot of pain. Utterly horrible.
I also had an utterly bizarre dream that I was watching "Mars Attacks" only things I wasn't expecting were happening in the film. There was much "ACK ACK ACK AAACK"-ing and there was a bit where they exploded the whitehouse which led to sirens and alarms going off. I then woke to find a car alarm going off outside which had clearly penetrated my dream.
Monday, November 17, 2003
Ear pain seems to have more or less gone however ear is still worryingly gunky.
I'm in a reasonably amiable mood today, despite the weather being so crappy. To be honest I quite like the rain as long as it's not too cold and that's what it's like today. Hmm typically british blog, rambling about the weather.
I had an amusing and bizarre dream last night which isn't very good on continuity like most dreams. It started where I was in the Lord of the Rings saga as a warrior in Arwen's elven army (Arwen as played by Liv Tyler - just as gorgeous in my dream as she is on the film - cow - hehe, just kidding Liv's lawyers). We were fighting a horde of wargs and orcs on the edge of a cliff, by the sea and it was bloody scary, but more in an exciting way than a nightmarish way if that makes any sense. I managed to spear a huge warg that was just about to rip my throat out. The wargs weren't as portrayed in the New Line, Peter Jackson films but more like the huge werewolves in the American Werewolf in Paris film (I think they look a damn sight more evil and terrifying than the film wargs, which I thought were quite disappointing, really). We eventually had to retreat because they outnumbered us and we were losing warriors all over the place so I hid behind a rock and managed to leave the scene undetected. The dream suddenly panned to me inside a huge internet cafe (of which there are so many in Lord of the Rings) and this bit is a bit blurry but I clearly remember stealing a calculator that was lying on the side. I wasn't sure what I needed it for, I just knew I needed it. I at some point worked out in the dream that by thinking "pause" I could pause everything around me and by thinking "hint" a hint would appear in a bubble in the right hand side of my vision. One was "Do not walk in front of this house until you have something to disable the security camera" (as you can see this is no longer anything like LOTR). So my dream had become a computer game. I no longer had anything to worry about as I could pause my dreams and get 'hints' whenever I needed them! The dream finished with me doing one to one combat with another girl and it started off with me doing the haka which was great fun. I awoke during the combat but I'm pretty sure I was winning.
Wednesday, November 12, 2003
I am in unutterable agony today. I have a nasty ear infection so I have horrible black gunk clogging it up and causing an incredible amount of pain. Ick.
I received the contract for the flat through the post today, hurrah. So it looks like it's all going ahead. I've still got lots to arrange and I haven't even started packing yet. I'm still nervous about all the money that's going to be spent between now and the end of the year but I'll just have to be careful. I suppose I'd better try and budget for it all. Oh just take it as it comes, I suppose.
Had a horrible nightmare, in which someone coloured in my eyes with permanent markers and blinded me. Sounds silly now I think about it but it was damn frightening at the time.
I had a go at painting last night for the first time in months and months and painted a teddy bear that Matt bought for me. I'd forgotten just how much I like painting and although I don't think I'm much good, Matt reckons my attempt is great but he would say that, not wanting to be dumped in a big huff, so I shall frame it and put it up in my flat and if visitors enquire what the hideous abomination is on the wall I will know he's lying and there'll be trouble!
Matt if you're reading this, I'm only kidding :)
Saturday, November 08, 2003
Splendid story but scarily accurate, really.
Wednesday, November 05, 2003
Saw the film Blazing Saddles last night. After 20 minutes of "what the bloody nora?" it finally settled into a splendid, if rather silly, utterly random, and hard to follow in places, film. I then went to rocsoc for a repeat of "it's not like the old days!". I've gone back to hardly knowing anyone there again and everyone looks so young. The horrid realisation that I was problably one of, if not the oldest there. Anyway it was shit and I started to feel very ill half way through so I went home. Today my skin actually hurts so I think I'm properly ill rather than the wine "disagreeing with me".
Tuesday, November 04, 2003
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/3238513.stm
"Our members don't want to buy their songs, they don't want to go to their movies, don't want to support their careers," said the National Rifle Association's executive vice-president Wayne LaPierre.Just the kind of toy-out-of-pram attitude I'd expect from someone who probably needs to own an arsenal to feel like a man.
Dustin Hoffman wrote to the NRA's president, Kayne Robinson, saying that "as a supporter of comprehensive gun safety measures, I was deeply disappointed when I discovered that my name was not on this list".Utterly splendid stuff. Fair play to Dustin Hoffman and the other celebrities on the list. I doubt they'll be too concerned if a few gun-crazy idiots boycott their films/music.
To quote Eddie Izzard"Guns don't kill people, people kill people, but I think the gun helps"
Yesterday I had encouraging evidence that not everyone is a money-grabbing bastard when I told my current landlady that I had to move, a mere 7 months before my lease actually ends. Most landlords that I've had experience of are utter gits and will try to screw you for every penny they can, for example the cunts ALP who withheld my deposit for "cleaning" even though the place was in a damn better state when I left it, than when I moved in to the grime ridden, rotten-parsnips-in-the-oven place. Anyone from Aber reading this, never ever rent a place from ALP, no matter what. I've not heard much better about Phil Evans. Anyway I digress. I told my landlady about my forced move, I think I scared the poor thing by starting with "I have some really bad news". I knew from viewing the place and moving in that she and the landlord seemed like decent, considerate people but they would be well within their rights to charge me some penalty for getting out of my contract early. Instead she said "Oh that's a shame, we'll miss you...no, no penalty, these things can't be helped" which was lovely and then went on to say "so when are you moving?..that means you don't owe us any more money then" and when I explained that I was moving a few days after my rent ran out she said "Oh don't worry about a few extra days, we're not like that!" which was a really refreshing and amazing thing. The University of Wales, Aberystwyth for example, will charge through the nose per night if you have/want to move in a couple of days early although they generally treat students like scum. I'm curious to stay overnight in halls for a conference or something to see how much better I'd undoubtedly be treated.
I hope I don't become money obsessed myself, now that I'm earning a bit more. I *do* whinge about taxes (who doesn't of those who pay them?) but that's more because the government just pisses them down the drain than having to pay them in the first place and they make it damn difficult to build up anything for yourself if you're on an average/slightly above average wage.
Monday, November 03, 2003
I've found a flat, yay! I now have to go through all the rigmarole of credit checks and everything (which should be ok but we'll see). It's a gorgeous flat with 2 bedrooms, a huge lounge, an office (advertised as a 3rd bedroom but I want to know what kind of pixie would use it as such), a yard and a garage. It's unfurnished so I now have to try to accumulate some furniture fercheap. Oh it's so horribly expensive and worrying. I'm hoping to be moving at the end of the month but I'll have to arrange that at some point today with various bosses and my landlord, who 'm really, really not looking forward to telling as I haven't come to the end of my minimum lease yet. I'm hoping I'll get a lump sum up front for relocation expenses too else I really won't be able to afford it. A spanner has also been thrown in the works by both weekends round the end of the month are taken up with me being somewhere. 28th I'm going to see Eddie Izzard in Manchester and the 5th is the company christmas do which I've already said I'll attend. Gah!
Searching for a flat was weird, it makes the whole thing seem more real and now I've started the ball rolling I have a feeling it will turn into a huge avalanche soon with arranging transport, packing and all that malarchy. My ankles are raw from wandering round Newbury. Typical that the first flat I looked at is the one I'm going for and the second one is a kind of backup if it falls through. I arranged to meet the Agent at the station entrance (not knowing my way around Newbury). So after 20 minutes of waiting we discovered there was another entrance on the other side of the track. We discovered the Agent was on the platform opposite and went over the stairs to see him, only to find he'd also come across to our platform! Like something from a bad comedy film!
There were some amusing little shits on one of the trains we caught too. They must have been about 12 years old and they thought they were so hard but they were talking in really posh voices and one in particular was trying to show off by inserting what he must have thought were impressive words into the conversation like so:"duuude these railway lines are so complex"and even better:"Neueu I did *not* have a happy meal, I had a double cheeseburger and small fries and small coke, happy meals are not dissimilar but they clearly only have a single cheeseburger, you oaf"They'd have got their heads kicked in if they were on a train in Manchester.
It was some kind of non-meet over the weekend. Great to see everyone again and got to quiz people about what it's like returning to Aber after being away for a bit. That'll be me soon.
